“The way I am running is not aimlessly; the way I am aiming my blows is so as not to be striking the air”. Setting relationship goals show direction and extensively stability. They create a sense of security and certainty. Have you differentiated goals within your relationship? These goals do not necessarily include material possessions, but uncomplicated ways that will increase the longevity of your union and love for each other. If you’re married or working on it, here are six relationship goals you and your mate should consider setting.
Focus on being better individuals
Prior to implementing any other relationship goal, your prerogative should include developing you as an individual. Are there any attributes you could develop or improve on to make you a better mate? Do you have any habits that could be merrily flushed down the toilet? Making regular self-assessments, should afford you the opportunity to make the necessary adjustments.
Do not be stringent or reason, “This is how I was made and you need to accept me as is”. No, that’s not the right attitude. Rather, you need to pay attention and work tirelessly on ways in which you can improve, especially when your mate points out a particular problem. No one is perfect. A workman, for example, always searches out new ways in which he or she can better hone and harness their skills. Shouldn’t you view your relationship in a similar light?
Tip: Make an unbiased evaluation of who you are as an individual. If you need help, ask a close friend who’s not afraid to spill the beans. Better yet, sit down with your mate and listen carefully, even when you don’t agree with what’s being said.
Give attention to your role in the family
Prior to the development of our society, men went to work in the fields while women stayed home to take care of the family. Subsequently, this arrangement changed and a woman was found in a man’s chair. However, this does not change the family arrangement. Each member of a family has their unique role to play. A woman is tasked with beautifying the home, making it a haven for her family and submitting to her husband, while a man is responsible for providing for the needs and welfare of his family. This in no way insinuates that a woman should slave at home. A man should show consideration and assist his wife where needed, just as a woman assist the man in paying the bills. By setting the relationship goal of carrying out one’s role, love and respect will flourish within the home.
Tip: Make a list of your roles as a husband and wife.
Putting each other’s interest first
A relationship should not be based on selfishness. Couples should be willing to get things done for each other. Instead of putting their needs ahead of their mate’s, they should consider that individual’s interest first. Doing this, each individual will always be seeking new ways every day to make each other happy.
Putting each other’s interest first calls for a compromise or the making of concession. Do you always insist on your way, regardless of what’s at stake and who you might hurt? Such selfishness, though commonplace in the family, should be rooted out promptly.
Tip: Before making a decision, consider how your spouse would feel. That will prompt you to discuss the matter with your mate, before making a decision.
Improving communication skills
Communication is a vital ingredient to the success of a relationship. Lack of communication creates suspicion, insecurities, loneliness, and extensively infidelity. A married couple should make time to talk and discuss important
matters relating to the family’s welfare. Though each individual may live busy lives, it’s not implausible to communicate during the day.
Improvements in technology have made it even easier for couples to communicate. On the other hand, it could cause a division within the family. Instead of spending time on technology performing mundane activities, why not make it an appointment to contact your mate during the day, especially while away from home? You might be amazed at the power of a simple, “How is your day going?” text message. Look out for every opportunity to communicate with your love ones.
Tip: Try to eat a meal together every day. Technology has also made it easier to communicate so use that to your advantage.
Willingness to compromise
Couples should learn to settle concessions. Though not easy, compromising works hand in hand with “putting each other’s interest first”. Do not always try to have things done your way. Two different minds won’t always agree, but you can come to an agreement for the sake of peace and your relationship.
Tip: Figure it out! I don’t know what problems you face.
Being better listeners
This relationship goal is important. Without making an attempt to listen, applying the aforementioned tips is futile…. “a chasing after the wind”. Since there’s a “time for everything”, make it your goal to listen when your mate is speaking… Do not wander in thoughts.
Tip: Be slow about speaking… Do not allow your mouth and your partner’s to compete. This isn’t Family Feud.
Though putting into practice the given six relationship goals won’t be easy, it can be done with much exertion and effort. Simply ‘trying’ will go a far way.